Aubrey Posen: A Victim of Theft!
by waatp
Summary: Aubrey calls an early morning 'emergency' Bella meeting to find out who stole an item of grand importance from her after a late night party. A Whodunit Of Sorts. One Shot Cheesy Aubrey Fluff (with a side order of cheese). I own nothing :)


**.o0o. The Early Morning Bella Meeting .o0o.**

"Aubrey? What the fuck are you doing getting us all up at six thirty on a fucking _Sunday_ morning?" Beca barked out, her voice still a little hoarse from the previous nights' tequila party at Fat Amy's place. She crossed from Aubrey's dorm door to take up position on one of the cushions left over from the vocals rehearsal the afternoon before.

"Yeah Aubrey, what are we all doin' here mate." Fat Amy started to say, sitting cross legged in Aubrey's perfectly organised closest for reasons only known to herself. She started dipping her hands into the alphabetised storage boxes. "I ain't been to bed yet and I'm meeting Bump-"

"-Amy, please take a seat out here and please, for goodness sake, will you stop going through my underwear!" Aubrey spoke clearly, sweeping a few stray hairs from her forehead, tucking them behind her ear. "Ladies, can we all take a spot on the floor, please."

"What's going on?" Beca huffed as she drew her knees up to her chest. Fat Amy took a cushion on Beca's side, stuffing whatever it was she had in her hand into her pockets as she sat. Chloe, looking more morose than she did, flopped on to a cushion on her other side.

"No idea!" Chloe yawned, settling her head onto her friends shoulder for a moment. "Got a text, probably the same *yawn* one as you about half an hour for an emergency Bella meeting so *yawn* here I am ... Tom wasn't pleased either so remind me to take coffee back with me."

"Are we all here?" Beca asked Chloe, discretely trying to shake the red head off her shoulder, because as much as she loved Chloe and she really _did_ love her best friend, the 'don't get too close before the morning cup of coffee' rule still _firmly_ applied. She watched Chloe do a quick head count before nodding and relaxing back onto Beca's shoulder.

All of the Bella's were looking a little bleary eyed. Stacie especially looked worse for wear, having started drinking earlier than everyone else the night before. Only Fat Amy seemed to be enjoying this early morning treat.

"Well?" Aubrey asked, standing in front of her fellow Bella's, wearing what Lilly would describe as her best death stare. The infamous pout was steadfastly plastered on her face, her eyes were narrowed and anyone could see she meant business by the set of her shoulders and the poise of her hips.

Each Bella shot a look around at each other. Confused didn't even begin to cover it. No one wanted to speak for fear of incurring the unspent wrath!

"Well, what?" Cynthia Rose bravely volunteered first, earning the death stare and pout being directed her way.

"I ..." Aubrey paused for dramatic effect and rolled her wrists for good measure, pausing for a split second on each girls face. "... have been stolen from!"

A collection of gasps, and an overly exaggerated eye roll from a certain brunette, reverberated around the room.

"Yes. It's true." Aubrey continued, woefully. "And, furthermore, I am 100% convinced that the culprit is in this room."

Beca noticed how more than one Bella was now fighting to keep a smirk off their face. She was about to open her mouth to speak when Aubrey continued, clearly not finished or prepared to take the dramatics down a notch. Beca watched everyone mouth the next words along with Aubrey, having heard the phrase many times before.

"Does anyone have anything to confess?"

Despite knowing what was coming, it was so hard for Beca not to _want_ to laugh as each and every Bella's face coloured. Everyone began to speak at once –

_"-Drinking your bleach is hardly a crime."_

_"-You said 'help yourself'."_

_"-I'll put your underwear back."_

_"-I've had those earrings for a month, and you only just realised."_

_"-Technically, you took it from the cafe downstairs first so ..."_

_"-I only borrowed it."_

_"-You had two of them."_

_"-If you gave it up willingly, I wouldn't have to try to get you drunk to steal it."_

_"-Oh, for fucks sake!"_

Aubrey raised a hand to silence the group, which surprisingly worked. There was a moment or two of awkward silence.

"Is this the same thing as the 'Case of the Missing Cookie'? Remember how you bellowed at us for five minutes straight when you thought one of us had stolen one of your carefully counted, rationed out, double chocolate chip cookies, baked to perfection from your favourite ever bakery out on South Street, only for you to look again and discover that despite all your smarts, you simply can't count properly?" Beca asked sarcastically, earning more than one snigger from the group. "You were checking us for crumbs! _Crumbs_ dude!"

"Let's not forget the 'Case of the Stolen Bella Scarf'. We sleuthed that one pretty well!" Chloe laughed, teasing her best friend gently. "Only took us a couple of minutes to find it tucked under the piano in the drama studio! I'm still surprised we all managed to sleep that night; you know, with all that worry!"

"And what about the 'Case of the Lost Hour', when the clocks changed and you refused to believe us?" Cynthia Rose remembered. "Took you calling the Dean of the University to confirm that it was true, rather than actually believe us when we told you we weren't playing a prank on you."

"Oh! My favourite!" Stacie said, joining in. "The 'Case of the Disappearing Drink'! You were convinced someone else was drinking your beers that night but who ended up being the most drunk?! Hmmm? Photographic evidence the next day pretty much backed us up."

"Yeah, but that night, we also solved two other whodunits. Remember?" Amy mused. "The 'Case of the Abducted Legs'. Simply because you couldn't walk properly ... you thought we'd pinched your legs or summat; we solved that one pretty quick by countin' your empty beer bottles and ticklin' your feet. And consequentially, the 'Case of the Pinched Pants", which if memory serves me right, and it usually does, were later discovered up the campus flagpole about three hours later when Campus Security brought you back to the dorm."

"Enough!" Aubrey cried out. "I admit, in the past, I _may_ have been a little premature in saying that something had been stolen, misplaced, lost or borrowed, but this is serious guys? I seriously lost something last night-"

"-It don't grow back you know, once you lost it dude-" Beca helpfully interrupted, smirking as usual.

"-and I know one of you took it." Aubrey continued, ignoring the snark. "And I'd like it back please."

"Bree, it might be helpful to tell us what's missing? Then we can all help look for it." Chloe suggested gently, stifling a yawn.

"And I'd like to know why we had to be brutally dragged from our beds at an unholy hour on a Sunday morning to look for it." Beca said.

"Well, you see it's not an object as such ..." Aubrey began to explain. This whole thing was going exactly as she had planned it to.

"So, I can keep your panties?" Fat Amy asked, causing Lilly to give her the weirdest look.

"... I didn't realise until the middle of the night, when we all left Amy's party, that it had been taken." Aubrey elaborated. "I'm especially careful with it usually and have never lost it before. I'm perfectly sure that the person who stole it from under my nose meant to keep it safe. When I thought about it during the night, I should have noticed the clues beforehand. Subtle hints showed perhaps an intended plan for the next few months. And that is how I'm actually, absolutely _convinced_ that I _know_ who took it. I'm not sure they meant to at that particular moment, so I thought I'd give that person a chance to give it back and we can go on our merry ways."

The Bella's shot each confused glances and guilty looks.

"Who is it Bree?" Chloe asked. "Who stole from you?"

"It's Beca." Aubrey said, now wearing a slightly softened expression.

"Me?!" Beca started, pushing herself onto her knees, spilling Chloe from her shoulder, as the other girls stared at her. "I've never stolen _anything_ in my entire life!"

"So, it a 'Case of the Stolen ...' what? What did Beca steal?" Chloe asked, determined to get to the point so she could go and get a hot shower, a strong coffee and then get back into bed with Tom.

"Yeah Aubrey! What the fuck did I steal?" The brunette said, now standing, staring down Aubrey defiantly as everyone else in the room looked as surprised as monkeys.

"Beca, you stole my heart."


End file.
